Allison/Al and Miriam/Merm, Lakewood, CO
How did you and your significant other meet?
Al: We met the good old fashioned millennial way… on Tinder about 6 years ago! Merm had recently moved to Colorado from Oregon for grad school, and I had recently come out as a lesbian and was newly dating when we matched. But then Merm ghosted me! Until about a month later when she reached back out and asked to meet up irl. Lucky for her, I agreed. We met at Roosevelt’s in Downtown Denver for drinks. They have their menus in books with have prompts and questions about life for customers to answer. We wrote in those books on our first date and every anniversary we go back to write in another book and look for all our old answers.
As a couple, what are your interests/hobbies?
Merm: We are very independent people and have quite different hobbies. Al loves to cook, knit, and read, while I like to mountain bike, draw, and make pottery. Where we meet in the middle is our love for adventure and exploring. We love to travel together and we go off-roading and car camping every chance we get. Al gets to read in a hammock in the forest while I get to mountain bike and soak in the sun. It’s a great way we get to connect while keeping our independence, which is really important to us. We also love paddle boarding and snowboarding. So, you can often find us outdoors regardless of the weather.
When did you know your partner was “the one” and you wanted to get married?
Al: I knew pretty early on that Merm is incredibly special and that I would be so lucky to get to do life with her. She’s this super suave cool girl, but when you get to know her, she’s just this utterly goofy, silly, and kind soul. A few months in, I actually found a ring that I loved (on Balefire’s website, no joke!) and thought “if I ever propose to Merm, this is the ring.” I meant to keep that to myself, but I blabbered about it to her a few days later while on a late night stroll around our neighborhood… after a few glasses of wine. While I had this gut feeling so early on, it wasn’t until about three years in, after we survived Covid in a 2-bedroom apartment with 3 people, 2 dogs, and a cat, that I was absolutely sure that I wanted to marry Merm. As we quarantined in that tiny apartment, we just continued to grow closer and closer. There's truly never a dull moment when we’re together. She makes life fun, exciting, and loving. I think not only have we made it through difficult times, but we’ve made it through stronger. I love taking on challenges with Merm my by side. I know Merm is the one because we consistently show up for each other when it matters most and that we never stop smiling and giggling along the way. Merm: It was a culmination of moments for me. The first moment was after a terrible Covid roommate situation and figuring out what to do while both being in grad school and the stresses that come with that. It didn’t immediately come to me, but I started having thoughts and feelings of this could be something truly lasting. She’s brilliant, beautiful, the goofiest, devious, and has the dance moves of a 60 year old. Another moment that solidified that feeling was on my first international trip, and our first international trip together. We knew we traveled great together, but what we didn’t know was what we would do in a crisis. In Guatemala, our trust and patience truly got tested when I got stung on the head by a scorpion and my body started to shut down. Although we were both scared, I knew during that whole time that I could trust her with my life. That no matter what, she’ll be by my side, and fight for me. I saw a brave woman with the biggest heart, and the person I choose to navigate this world with. Through every moment, our relationship strengthened, and I knew if she was someone that could break down my walls, that we could build a life together. She is a force of chaos and love all in one—she is the one.
What is one of your favorite things about your partner?
Merm: how weird she is and how sly she thinks she is! And that unlike me, she likes people. I love her kind soul. Al: Her sick dance moves is one thing, but she’s also pretty handy with a saw and an axe… but actually, I love how well she knows people. She has this keen sense of awareness about the world and an understanding about people that I’ve never quite understood. She’s just got the strongest gut of anyone I know, and it fascinates me!
What was your proposal like (was the ring a surprise or was it collaborative)?
Merm: About a year ago, we discussed getting married and decided that we would both propose. It didn’t matter who proposed first, when it happened, or how, just that whenever one of us was ready and felt it was right, we would go for it. We discussed our individual styles and each went ring shopping to get an idea of what we wanted. The ultimate goal being to surprise the other. I’ve had my plan for about a year now… Al: For Miriam’s ring, I knew I wanted to work with an independent local jeweler, and kept an eye on Balefire’s website until I saw a beautiful geometric bi-color sapphire that I thought was absolutely perfect. So, I made an appointment to make a custom ring with that stone and then started planning the proposal from there. I knew I wanted it to be a surprise, but Miriam knows me so well, I knew hiding this would be a huge challenge. In order to keep it a surprise, my original plan had to be scrapped again and again until I got to about plan E. We were headed to the Paint Mines outside of Calhan, Colorado for a sunrise hike and I knew it would be a stunning place to propose. I wanted to give her this really cool rock among some other really cool rocks. It was perfect. So, in typical Merm and Al fashion, we car camped nearby on a wind turbine farm we rented for the night. We got up before sunrise and headed for the Paint Mines. We were the first ones at the park, so we started exploring the formations. Little did Merm know, I was scouting for the perfect spot to pop the question. Eventually, we made it to this gorgeous spot with red and orange clay rock formations and I set up my camera. First, I did a timed photo. Then I went back to “check the photo” and set it up for a video. I asked her to marry me, and she was completely surprised. She had absolutely no idea! We both cried and it was so special. We spent the rest of the morning exploring and then we headed for brunch and a weekend of pampering. Merm thought we were camping the whole weekend, but I actually packed a secret bag full of nice clothes and everything we would need for a mini getaway weekend to celebrate.
Tell us about your wedding (if it has happened yet).
Merm and Al: For now we are just enjoying being engaged. And plus, one of us still has to officially propose! What we do know is that we want to celebrate with all our family and friends. It will of course probably be outdoors. And, it’s important to us that we incorporate as many Jewish and Mexican traditions as we can, while still making sure to break any of the wedding traditions that don’t quite suit us. The rest is TBD!
Why did you decide to work with Balefire?
Al: It’s always been important to me to shop local and support small businesses. Merm and I used to live around the block from Old Town Arvada and always loved checking out the jewelry at Balefire whenever we were on our weekend strolls. We always felt welcomed at Balefire, even just window shopping years ago. I loved the alternative style of many of the items for sale and the uniqueness in Balefire’s former custom rings. As two very non-traditional people who don’t quite fit many societal standards, I felt like Balefire would help us find rings that truly felt like “us.”
What advice would you give to other couples shopping for wedding or engagement rings?
Al: My advice is to not be afraid to break the mold and go for something a little different. Your relationship and your future marriage are solely for you and your partner. So, get something that feels like you. Something you are excited to wear every day and that reminds you of your partner and your love. And I highly recommend going custom to achieve this because you can add little details that really make it your own. And you will always have something that your partner collaborated on. That’s priceless! Miriam: Don’t be afraid to talk about rings. Talk about it in any context. The surprise won’t be ruined and you will be able to create or find something that is perfect for your person.
What is the name and social media links for the photographer to credit for any photos you shared with us?
Courtesy of sneaky Al herself!
